NTaLds...

Of course, some inidividuals make the journey increasingly difficult. There is a book, that sheds some light on the art of it all.


But, it all comes down to balance. The enlightened and the ignorant.
I have been trying to be the former...but I guess the one thing I know for sure is that I know nothing. And how ah yau?

"I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, I write award-winning operas, I manage time efficiently. Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row.


I woo women with my sensuous and godlike trombone playing, I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook Thirty-Minute Brownies in twenty minutes. I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru.


Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass cello, I was scouted by the Mets, I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after work, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.


I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. I don't perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller number nine and have won the weekend passes. Last summer, I toured New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal-force demonstration. I bat .400. My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles. Children trust me.


I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations for the CIA. I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Egypt, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. The laws of physics do not apply to me.


I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Years ago, I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven. I breed prizewinning clams. I have won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin.


I studied Jazz Performance at McGill, played drums for a living for 6 years, became a corporate pilot and have travelled around the world. Costa Rica is my favorite spot. I'm happily married, successfully keeping 10 plants and 2 trees alive in a tiny appartment, and have 2 chocolate labs as neices.


I have played Hamlet, I have performed open-heart surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis.


But I have not yet honed my skills at dealing with ignorant people...."

The result of ignorance? The Dutchman and I ponder that question constantly. When discussing the result of the bird-smacked-winglet, this question came into focus. Immagine the bird could speak. Immagine the bird was up for a nice evening flight with the flock when out of the clouds comes a bright light movin' at 250 kts. Poor bird was just minding his own business and happened to be on the tracks listening to his ipod when the train came a rollin. At this thought the Dutchman and I decided to have a moment of silence for our fallen bretheren.

Until the silence was broken by the Dutch... "what if the bird was an ignorant, anti-disestablishmentarianistic french bird? what if he saw the plane and decided "NO! Screw yau airplane!! This is MY sky! I don't ave to move fah yau!!"
'Twas a good laugh.
Here's what was left. Part of the birds skull was embedded in 2-inch-thick fiberglass. Not cool.


J